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Delusional Disorder

Nisan 21, 2013Nisan 21, 2013 emelozturk

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Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/5087530

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/5087530

This is any given weekend from my life...I postpone 'waking up' untill the sun reaches the top of the sky and starts lighting directly into my eye...

The moment i wake up i realize the big black spot in my mind..."oookkeey...we met , we were dancing..and then...then the..we..and i woke up" there is no point trying harder , i know it has happened before and it will happen again...i accept the fact that i have to live with these black holes in my memory..

So what...pfff...

First thing after the bed , i go tot the fridge starwing...Open the door..

And we have a small moment with the fridge : only two of us , eye to eye ...

I decide to drink water , a lot of water...to keep my stomach busy until delivery comes...

and to keep myself busy i sit accross the TV...

The fastest fast food pizza comes right on time...yammm

And obviously coffee and cigarette have to follow

lay down, watch a bit more tv...there is nothing on tv..zap zap zap ...ad..movie...zap...america's got talent ...ad...zap...zap..MTV...leave it!

I go back to the fridge to check 'if' something has changed while i was watching TV...

hmmm...no ...there is still nothing in there

I need to clean the house ...i start the vacuum cleaner...God it's hard...

Let me take 5 minutes coffee break ..for 1, 2, 3 coffees...

Have to do laundry ..start the machine and...

Go check my mails ...ah my friend is online " hiiiii how are you ? " another hour passes and i get bored , i kindly excuse myself and say ' hey, listen it was great catching up , but i really need to go now . Take care " and sign off

I go to the washing machine , sit there and watch it working for another 1...hr...or maybe longer..i try to see if i can hypnotize myself...i guess i did hypnotize myself several times...

After my Washing Machine Meditation , i go back to my PC. My back hurts , so i change my position on the coach .

Damn , it's already getting dark, i have so much to do ....My heart squizes...

I decide to go to bed early , so i can wake up early tomorrow and get everything done ...

This is life as we all know ...and 90% of life consists of normal days like this one ...normal days spent sleeping, waking up , getting board, eating , cleaning , shopping, driving, working , doing random things...

and the remaining (at max) 10 % of life ...

is worth going on Facebook ...Travelling

Bungee Jumping and Paragliding...

and tasty and sweet and juicy ...

Ok , ok ...it's not 10% in your life...Your life is always Fun, not boring like mine...I know I know i know...you're cool ! :) I like it

New Hire in the Office

Nisan 21, 2013Nisan 21, 2013 emelozturk

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New Hire in The Office

After years of Education, finally the day has come...You are now a graduate! Full of confidence, full of hope, full of curiosity to explore a new era in your life...

A new life starts with a job hunting...Interviews, Assessments, Q&As, Skills, Tests...And finally you know what you want ...You fall in love with that company...You must be there ...You HAVE TO!

Congratulations! All these hard work finally pays off and you become officially an employee...here is your badge, you can start immediatelly

As a new hire, you get introduced to all your coworkers...It feels like you're walking on the Red Carpet...Almost...

You receive mail after mail welcoming you to your new family ...You can't help your mouth spreading from one ear to the other...

One staff meeting gives you a hand when you try to land safely to the ground when the clouds under your feet dissapear...All these abraviations, the language...Do they speak another language ? You seem to catch the idea and get the context ...like some words...Rev..mmm..SMS...Sales! Sales! yes....

When time comes to close the meeting everybody is aligned, happy and assigned a task...Finally YOU ...your manager points at you and asks for little help ...For you to coordinate things... And simplify ...and orchestrate if possible...You feel like your heart is going to explode , you wonder if others can actually see you shivering. Are you going to faint ? What is this pain in your stomach ?

You go back to your desk, try to remember what 'exactly' it was about ...You check your notes ...mmm, what's that supposed to mean ? OM, VPX? BMO...Office...Office is ok , office yes!...No ,this is not working at all - you don't understand what you've written couple of minutes ago...

You decide to ask for help to a friend you knew before joining the company ..." Hi , Can you please help ...How should i do this? .......What possibly could this mean : ( quoting from your notes) ' accelarate EOC, check with MI and consult with GM' Thanks " And you send the mail.

Your friend sits just accross you in a different cubicle...You make sure he gets the "urgent" mail and answers immediatelly...

He consults with his team and get's back to you ...You're happy :)

Oh! he proposes to call you , it's easier to explain...Ok! Let's see how this thing works. Headset, ok! Call, Ok! ...Your friend gets a bit frustrated waiting for you to connect ...You receive errors again and again...What's the matter with you ? "Try again" , "Try again", "Try again" - Really? what do you think i am doing? Panic and sweating doesn't help much. You decide to call IT for help . There must be something wrong in your set up , they need to fix it.

IT Guy comes and solves your issue ...He is your angel! And he advices " Next time , if this happens again, try restarting your PC before calling IT! "

Finally, you are connected... You are having your first company call...Isn't it amazing?

As per your friend's advice you reach out to the right people who might be able to help you ...

They try ...Everybody tries hard...You see every single person adding ideas, exchanging ideas, advising tools and resources, getting you in touch with other people ...You love it...And appreciate the help !

Later in the day , you receive a mail ... It is adressed to you , with almost everybody in the company on the CC line. That must be something really important. Somebody is asking you for help! Wait a second ?! Isn't it the same question you've raised a while ago...

You can't stop laughing , it ended up at you ...And you probably know much more than anybody else now ...You remember what you've been told during the first meeting you had with the company board - your interview " 70% of the learning comes from doing your job" You sit and draft a mail , all what you know: Giving advises, suggesting people, Tools and Resources ...and anytime they need your help ...if you can help...more than welcome!

You receive an instant message - :) Thank you! and reply "UW" ...This is your first small victory and another friend in your list

Happy to be able to help someone , you sign off and leave the office. that's how easy corporate work life is...Couple of mails, conference calls, re-shipping already re-packaged information to someone else, and most importantly being 100% sure of what you're doing when you're doing it, so there is no doubt of your capabilities and knowledge...Well Done... That was a great day ...You're again above the clouds on the way back home...Welcome to the company , Welcome to the Learning Experience ...Enjoy...The END ( of the first day only )

The Story of a Man, his World and his Wall

Nisan 21, 2013Nisan 21, 2013 emelozturk

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The Story of a Man, His World & His Wall

We come to life very well connected to the world around us...We breath and eat together...A 'me' without the world around is almost un-imaginable

The more we get control over our body we become independent...and start discovering the world from our 'own' point of view...We touch and taste it...

We make the world our playground...We make the world a friend...

Until one day we realize we have to do other stuff to be able to live happily ...And world distructs us from 'learning'...We keep the world outside of the room untill we know how to deal with life.

Years pass, and we live in our own world of music and revolution...The World our parents don't understand ...They live in their own world, where we don't want to belong to. So we start beilding our own world behind the wall putting one brick on top of other...( best with the headphones on , so we don't hear anything but music)

The Wall keeps us busy , gives us a sacred place to live.. A personal space , seperated from the shenanigans of outside world. We are safe here where we can be ourselves again

When time comes for a Job , we cover the walls of our innerworld with career...Graphs, statistics, building experiences, documents, papers , reaching heights in statistics...This is how we define ourselves, Career is what defines us ...

Untill one day , we discover love and decide to open up a gate into our world for the person we fell in love with...We kiss under that gate ...

We may even let the person come in...and share our world

Untill one day we realize and say " i need some space' and we start building another wall , excluding ourself , leaving the otherone out...

Most of the time after a short period of 'enjoying my own world honeymoon' we wake up in the emptiness of our world behind the wall and we ask ourselves 'Now What? "

We hear a sound calling our name from behind the wall...That's the familiar sound of an old friend ...30-40 years have passed? Really? That quick ?

Brick by brick we start getting down the wall...

Time is ticking and there is still a huge wall between us and the life - responsibilities makes us tired and slow us down.

Finally when the wall is about to disappear , the bells ring " Time is Over" . You tried your best , but maybe in your next life you'll be better in connecting to the world and enjoying life to the fullest.

We lay down under the leftovers of our wall, making a humble effort to mark a place in history. 'I was here' and this is finally the moment we connect back to world. It's as un-imaginable as in early years of life to be there without the world.

The End. You can try to change it , but this is most likely how all our lives will turn to be. The older you are the more you have to rush ...Life is tiring - The End.